Hello, young people, and welcome to the most fascinating time of your life. You have braved the trials of childhood and now you are reaching Canadian puberty. By now you’ve probably noticed some changes in your body. For instance, when you fart your dick gets hard. Other physical changes are happening to your body as well. If you’re a boy, you may notice that your testicles ache. Or if you’re a girl, you may notice a tingling sensation in your strange.
Going through Canadian puberty, you may notice that your voice is starting to change as well. You’re saying things like, “hey, buddy,” and, “hey, guy,” because now that you’re older, you’re discovering that someone who was once your buddy is now your guy. And someone who you used to call guy is quickly becoming your friend. But now let’s discuss how a man and woman make love.
First, a man and a woman fall in love. Then the man farts on the woman’s strange, filling the woman’s strange with air so the woman can queef in the man’s face, and the baby is born. The entire process can take up to six months and-
… It’s what?
… That’s not how a baby is born?
… What’s semen?
… Well then, why did my wife queef on my face?
… She said it was to-
… Well then why would sh-?!
… I’m gonna get to the bottom of this!